Such Names!

Players, I need you all to give me a minute while I collect myself. You see, I just checked out those Company Brewing scores from last night and frankly, I’m flabbergasted (that’s a real word, not just something my gramma used to mutter while adding macaroni to chili like some sort of big-timer who lived as though she had never heard of the great depression or a proper chili). 

To be fair to the Up & Under and Glass Nickel teams, it wasn’t so much the scores that were shocking, but the team names. Refrigerator, for example. They were easily the worst team at trivia last night. They scored 20 points, and I imagine Wisconsin’s Hardest Nick even let a few answers slide, but that name. OOOO DOGGIE. Then there was No Name, Effervescent Unicycle, Hot Bod of Christ and Whale Pharm. All of these teams could have combined their scores and still only ended up somewhere around third place, but they are name champions forever. 

Then there is Downstairs, It Rains Chives. While all of us simps are here on Earth playing Wisconsin’s Hardest Trivia, they’re playing Three-dimensional Wisconsin’s Hardest Trivia and they’re already six moves ahead. I bet this team all lives together in a Dymaxion house inside a geodesic dome. No chairs in the place, just a lot of cushions and Stars of the Lid albums Avec Laudenum, The Tired Sounds of Stars of the Lid, and Gravitational Pull vs The Desire for an Aquatic Life play at 20 percent volume at all times. 

Anyway, there is a tight race at the top of that CoBrew league, with Scrambled Eggs, Tunnelsnakes and Farts Anonymous all within five points of each other. 

Tonight, Wisconsin’s Hardest Trivia becomes corporeal, dons a crisp mariniere, or a breton stripe if you must, and captains the SSWHT down to Brady Street for Trivia at the Up & Under. Celebrity Guest Host Andy Berg is running it tonight and I heard he scores a real easy show. So slide on down and boost those Up & Under league scores. 

The show starts at 7pm. See you there.


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