New Players Welcomed, and Warned

Players, you know the day, the time and what is about to go down.

I like the idea that the previous statement prompted JB, or really any player who’s been in the mix for at least three weeks, to suddenly glance at their watch, chuckle to themself and think, “Some poor team is about to get wrecked tonight. Just imagine someone walking to Company Brewing with so much swagger. Shoulders held high to keep that full length rabbit fur coat from dragging on the floor. Sunglasses on the whole time. Diamond studded quellazaire loaded with a baby blue Export A.

You know that player takes a seat over off to the side. They’re going to use an additional table to lay out the jacket. And here’s the crazy part, this player, thinking they’re there to rename it Wisconsin’s Moderately Difficultist Trivia, they pull off the Watership Down piece and what are they wearing underneath? An oversized, rabbit fur jumper and contrasting but coordinating rabbit fur trousers. God damn. Team Leporidae came to get a sip from the firehose that is Wisconsin’s Hardest Trivia. Friggin’ fools.”

And then JB just goes right back to work. But tonight JB and his whole team will be at Company Brewing in Riverwest. Pints of Space Whistle in their hands and ready for Wisconsin’s Hardest Nick to drop 50 killer questions on the place.

The show starts at 7pm. See you there.

Also, there are categories about rats and famous photographers tonight.

 

Them Very Holy Days

Greetings! And welcome to November. We’re talking peak Autumn here. The leaf peepers are gone. And the dried leaves that remain hang from skeletons in the deciduous forests, leaving the cold, unloving touch of conifers as the only beacon of life.

Ahh. but it is in this time, that we here at Wisconsin’s Hardest Trivia celebrate. We welcome the darkening days. And today, the first of November, falling on a Monday is truly magical. If you’re living right, you’re riding the costume and candy wave right into the local Samhain bonfire. And then, after your bare feet have communed with the earth for long enough, you run home to set out a french roll. If you’ve been good, or at least not a scumbag, you’ll wake up to a hot beef and giardiniers.

All that is great, and trust me that sandwich, kissed by the wings of St. Mothman himself, could hold you over until the day of the People’s Feast. But now we slide right into Dia de los Muertos. So you know Wisconsin’s Hardest Nick is going to be posting up pictures of all the trivia teams we’ve lost. Can you even imagine the gifts we’d leave for a team like Tunnelsnakes? A team that has been dead for years and yet still walks among the living? The gifts would be bonkers.

And then compare that to a team that we haven’t seen in ages. Something like 3 Guys on a Fact Hunt. I mean, I can only assume that team is dead because I’m not getting 35 emails each week about how I’m an idiot for claiming Zaha Hadid was a bolder architect than Richard Neutra. I get it, Neutra built on Frank Lloyd Wright’s concept of eliminating the distinction between indoors and out-of doors and gave us his signature spider leg. But now consider something like the Vitra fire station or, if your heart and brain can even handle it, the Havenhuis. And then gtfo.

Whatever, 3GoaFH will get Wonder bread as an offering.

All that said, Nick is going to be riding high tonight for Wisconsin’s Hardest Trivia. He’s got 50 questions ready to launch, and there’s even a category about Dune, so you know it’s going to get good. All you have to do is show up at Company Brewing, let a couple snifters of George’s Serious Breakfast open you up to the spirit world and welcome November in the right way.

The show starts at 7pm. See you there.

 

The Will Be Metaphorical Blood

Player, I’m talking to you. Look at me. I’m looking directly at you now. I’m talking lazer-like focus and intensity right now.

You feel that?

Now hear me out. I’m asking you to use two senses now. Or you can read my lips, whatever, I just need to know you’re absorbing and processing the words I’m saying. Now hold on, I usually don’t codone, nor participate in, physical contact during these posts. But I’m going to grab you by the biceps and pull you in close.

Can you smell that coffee on my breath? I should hope so because I have already had several cups and you are very close to my face. And it’s some aging Colectivo blend I brought with me as I have yet to find a local roaster to supply Wisconsin’s Hardest Trivia Institute of Carpetbaggery, Social Subversion and Lady Elizabeth Bathory Bleed Station and Bathhouse pop-up.

Okay, listen up. There is trivia tonight. And I know, Wisconsin’s Hardest Nick may be tall, and I mean justly ungodly tall, he’s like 18 feet high, but he won’t hurt you. The questions he asks tonight might be scary, but they’re just questions.

Are they going to be super spooky questions? Of course, it’s the last show before Halloween. But they’re just words and slides. Player, you can handle this.

All you need to do is get you and your team down to Company Brewing in Riverwest, tonight. It’ll be a little frightening, but then you’ll slide down a couple pints of Lordy Lordy hazy IPA and you’ll be the boldest MFer in the joint.

Look at you, our brave little trivia player.

The show starts tonight at 7pm. See you there.

 

Remote Dispatches

Players, I woke up this morning to startling news. It’s news we knew was coming, as evidence of it has been in every Target and Neiman Marcus you walk through. But this morning it really hit home that consumerists and retail giants have successfully eliminated the fall season. We now go from the post Labor-Day tucking of the whites, wherein we used to spend the days swapping out our summer fits for cardigans and moleskin pants or a pleasantly heavier weight twill chino, directly to hanging stockings by the fire with care.

This doesn’t set well at Wisconsin’s Hardest Trivia Global Headquarters, Rap Emporium and Exsanguination Station. And when word hit Wisconsin’s Hardest Trivia Institute of Carpetbaggery and Social Subversion. I nearly jumped right out of the coffin I am currently using as my seasonally themed sleep station when the elderly, who are to read to me my emails each morning, informed me of no less than six emails regarding rising prices and that the best Black Friday shopping starts right now.

Players, You know Wisconsin’s Hardest Nick is an autumnal creature. And you know covered in sweat is not my best look. And even Anjali, who many of you have never met in person, you know Anjali favors a midweight jacket. Dog, you can’t hang an AAAJ pin and carry an empty glass bottle, an old rag and about 12 ounces of gasoline while wearing a lightweight tee. Summertime is about tolerance, but fall is about versatility and readiness.

Plus, we need this season to break out trivia categories on death, dormancy and the coming winter. Or in the case of this week’s show, movie monsters.

So once you get your team together, and you’ve grabbed all your clutch Black Friday finds, get yourselves to Company Brewing in Riverwest for the Wisconsin’s Hardest Trivia live show.

You won’t be able to get the Bent Stick Brewing Thank You, Next Double IPA, as they are an Alberta-based brewer and the pic comes to us from Bike Ripper and Super Scientist S. Koenig, PhD, who doesn’t even play trivia but lives in Alberta, but you can get so many other delightful libations.

 

The show starts at 7pm. See you there.

 

Delta in the Time of Delta

Madison, what’s good?

I’ll tell you what’s good. I’ll tell you what’s going down.

Thursday night. One night only. We’ve got an in-person trivia show. Through friends of friends of friends, we’re knocking out a one time show at Delta Beer Lab on the southside.

Now players…players, think about how many prizes I owe you and your teams. I’m talking about

those old Spoony Bards players, those Team Drink Tickets rippers, the Good Enough sleeper cell, they all have so many things coming their way. Consider Sarina, of Alphabet Mafia. Sarina will be walking out of the place with enough prizes to save the whole Goon Docks.

Now, there are other things to consider, specifically covid-19. Delta Beer Lab is providing us with fully vaxxed staff and large, semi-open space. I’m vaxxed, co-host E.Chun is vaxxed and you know we’re gonna be cheeks deep in masks. All we ask of you is:

  • Get your respected asses vaccinated. If you’re not vaxxed, please stay home and stay safe.
  • Dane County will be back into a mask mandate, so keep that mask up unless you’re eating or drinking.
  • Give everyone, teammates and other teams, the space they need to feel comfortable.
  • If you can’t make it, know that you are still loved and respected by the Wisconsin’s Hardest Trivia community.

I hope to see as many of you as possible tomorrow night. The show starts at 7pm at Delta Beer Lab on Badger Rd. See you then.

 

Word on the Street

I haven’t been in Milwaukee proper lately but there seems to be a buzz about this week’s show. A friend of mine, probably Mel or Johnnie for the purposes of this story, said they were standing at the end of Wisconsin Ave, looking at the Calatrava’s wings, spread out over the Quadracci Pavilion and the Reiman Bridge, looking majestic as hell. And there were others there, talking about how they were in town for trivia and decided they would also take in this art. They also added, “We thought it would be bigger”.

Anyway, my friend turns to these trivia tourists and says, “I hope you weak-ass trivia tarts aren’t here to play Wisconsin’s Hardest Trivia at Company Brewing on Monday Night. Because that show is not for some out of town, weekday warrior chump. Now, week day Wario, that evil MFer is welcome to play anytime. I mean don’t get me wrong, come to Company Brewing. Guzzle down some suds and grab a bite to eat, but don’t think you’re coming onto my turf, talking to my Wisconsin’s Hardest Nick, scoping my questions about the Fast and Furious franchise, or even current events. You really think I’m going to let you walk into my territory, have the most fun you can on a Monday night, and then go home and tell your friends and family about this Wisconsin’s Hardest Trivia show…that’s Wisconsin’s Hardest Trivia Show Monday nights at 7pm at Company Brewing in Riverwest. C’mon blud, you know better. I’ll see you then.”

Anyway, the show starts at 7pm tonight. See you then.

 

Dreamy Trivs

 

This message right here goes out to the true Milwaukee players, the Company Brewing trivia hounds, the dreamers of dreams–the kind of dreams that are often like “we were at Company Brewing, Nick was there but he had a green mohawk like the time he went to the Corn Palace with his family. And Canadian Mel was there, but it wasn’t Canadian Mel it was an animatronic cowboy who would just lift his arm to get a bottle labelled XXX close-ish to the unmoving mouth and then would shout ‘OOOOOO! That’s some good moonshine. Now who’s ready to play some trivia? I hope the cowpokes on my team put some knowledge under them ten gallon hats, ‘specially about Famous Fictional Cowboys.’ So obviously it wasn’t really Mel. but it had a real Mel jeau de vive. Then again, I get that from most animatronics. Jesus, you don’t think Mel’s an animatronic do you?”

Slow it down there, players. I think we lost the plot a little bit right there, but I’m not upset with where it went. I mean most of the needed information was provided. There is a trivia show at Company Brewing tonight. Nick will be there reading out the questions and blasting through the answers. There will be food and drinks and prizes for the top teams. Really the only thing not covered was that the show starts at 7pm.

See you there.

 

Your Week 31 News

Players, let’s take a minute to discuss those scores at Company Brewing last night.

The scores were so good. We’re talking about scores like 29, 31 and 36. Then there were others like 51, 52, and 53. Can you even imagine being on one of those teams? So much pressure to squeeze out just one more point. Or getting to the end of the game and learning that you fell just one or two points short of a truly greater ranking. Maybe you should have tried a little bit harder in that Tulsa category, you know?

And let’s talk about the team that put up 93 points. That is insanity. And of course the team that banged down those points also delivered in the name category. I mean they called themselves “Donte Divincenzooey Deschanel”.

C’mon. No way. Sit down. Aww hell.

Names that good are few and far between. And I have to be extra thankful for that team name because it hopefully softens the blow of the next piece of trivia news.

We’re holding off on the virtual shows for the next few weeks. I’m looking for a safe location for an in-person Madison show, but it’s not working well so far.

As soon as I have a location, the word will go out. There are so many prizes to hand out and so many vaxxed hugs and high-fives to give. We’ll keep you posted regarding the future of shows in Madison, Tulsa and online. But for now, pack ‘em in over at Company Brewing.

 

A NOTE!

Once again Wednesday is upon us. That means it’s the day we all wake up, slide on those trivia pants and pretend any part of the day matters before seven o’clock central standard time tonight.

Now, if you’re an avid reader/true believer/subscriber to the Wisconsin’s Hardest Trivia mythos you noticed the Monday-night Company Brewing players got no tips, clues or hints on how to tackle this week’s show. That’s because sometimes, I, your dedicated trivia record keeper and clerk, needed to go rub my face in whatever soup one can make from a simmering pot of oil money, Art Deco design and the literal and metaphorical blood of the most prosperous black community in this country’s history.

Speaking of soup and horrible transitions I hope all you players get ready for a whole category on soup this evening. Grab your spoons and get your team in the mix:

  1. The Wisconsin’s Hardest Trivia entrance fee is $5/player, or $25/team of six players. Teams can still play with more than six players, but will be docked 10 points for each additional player. Drop your payments on paypal.me/SlashGreg.
  2. Once your team has registered, you’ll get the password to the Zoomiary.
  3. Be sure your teammates know your team name before the game starts, this will allow us to put you on the right team.
  4. Finally, if you have any questions, drop an email on Nick@wisconsinshardesttrivia.com, Anjali@wisconsinshardesttrivia.com or Greg@wisconsinshardesttrivia.com and we’ll get you in the mix.

The show starts at 7pm. See you then.

 

Basking in the Glow

Players, this is where we start to see the shortcomings of the in-person shows and, ultimately, the perfection of the virtual shows.

Imagine being a player on a team like Bobby Portishead or Thrillho–one of those teams that banged down 69 points for a top spot tie Monday night at Company Brewing. Noble efforts by both teams for sure. But they were able to soak in their glory stew for like 12 hours. Maybe 24 if they didn’t have to start planning how they were going to move about Milwaukee last night. Then they were immediately upstaged by the World Champion Milwaukee Bucks.

Just think about some sour-ass Thrillho players looking at the nearly 100,000-person celebration going on last night and mumbling, “Big deal, we won trivia on Monday and they didn’t close down any streets for us.”

I don’t even know Thrillho but I can tell you, that team needs to drop the attitude.

Now we roll into the virtual game, where we’ve got teams like Alphabet Mafia and OGNeal of Fortune, playing their guts out for the win. Can you imagine 30 years from now, OGNOF Grampa Gabe telling the young ones about how he watched the Bucks become world champs and then his team stacked up a second win via Wisconsin’s Hardest Trivia? So really it’s like being back-to-back champions.

I also suspect he ends that story by making some comment about the Bulls winning several championships and then telling the kids to get outside and play because it’s only 110 degrees and the weather doesn’t get any more perfect than that.

So if you’re on OGNOF and you want to make this a reality, or you’re on any other team and you want to foil Gabe’s future, I suggest getting into the game tonight. To show the world what you’ve got, get your team together and get registered for tonight’s show:

If you want to play tonight’s online game, get your team ready.

  1. The Wisconsin’s Hardest Trivia entrance fee is $5/player, or $25/team of six players. Teams can still play with more than six players, but will be docked 10 points for each additional player. Drop your payments on paypal.me/SlashGreg.
  2. Once your team has registered, you’ll get the password to the Zoomiary.
  3. Be sure your teammates know your team name before the game starts, this will allow us to put you on the right team.
  4. Finally, if you have any questions, drop an email on Nick@wisconsinshardesttrivia.com, Anjali@wisconsinshardesttrivia.com or Greg@wisconsinshardesttrivia.com and we’ll get you in the mix.

The show starts tonight at 7pm central. See you then.

 

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